Why is sex before marriage such a big deal?

Sex...just saying the word can cause a persons mind to wonder in certain directions. What is the big deal? Why does God tell us in Scripture to avoid "sexual immorality"? What is sexual immorality? Is sex before marriage really that bad?

Those are some great questions!! Sex is a big deal, but not for the reasons you might think. It isn't a big deal because God is a kill-joy. It isn't a be deal because a bunch of strait edged Christians decided "fun" was the devils tool. Sex is a big deal because God designed it to be something great!! It's kind of like this, you don't buy a great game system for a three year old. they will simply take the controllers and break them. Sure they might try to use the system, but they do not have the right experiences, maturity, and commitment (they didn't have to raise the money to buy it) to operate it the way it is intended to be opperated. God created sex to be great and amazing for people who have the right experiences, maturity, and commitment to participate in sex. When it is not used in the right context it can be damaging to a relationship instead of good for a relationship.

God is all about relationships, He created mankind to have a relationship with him and he created man and woman to have a relationship with each other. These are good things!! God wants people to have the best relationships possible. Sex is a physical intimacy that caries with it an emotional and even spiritual connection. It is not optional, you can't turn off those connections and I am not sure why you would want to. Sex in the right context (between one man and one woman inside the commitment of marriage) is great and those connections bring the two people involved close together. Sex actually is good for a marriage relationship. When there is not physical intimacy taking place inside of marriage there are likely problems. Hebrews
Hebrews 13:4 tells us clearly that we are to keep the marriage bed pure. The problem is this sexual intercourse isn't the only thing two people should not do outside of marriage. Some have made the mistake of believing that everything except intercourse is acceptable. The problem is this Intercourse itself is not where the spiritual and emotional connection takes place. The connection takes place in all forms of physical intimacy at different levels. The more physical a couple become the more they are connected emotionally and spiritually. That is why there needs to be a commitment surrounding deep expressions of physical intimacy. We should not be asking "how far is too far?" instead we should be asking "what is good, wise, and honoring to God in a relationship?" When we ask the first question we are trying to get as close to sin as we can without sinning. In one sense this is itself a sin. Our attitude is not a Christ like attitude. The second question is one of submitting to a wise God who has our best interests in mind.

Sex outside of marriage dulls the senses and limits the quality of future relationships. Having sex with several people trivializes sex and in so doing trivializes marriage. The best sex is found only in marriage and the strongest marriage relationships will be ones where the couple did not have sex outside of marriage.